"A good person..."

"You are a good person!" she told me today. This was my therapist at the end of our session together telling me that I was a good person. For some reason, it made me think all day, about what is a good person and how do you become or live your life as a good person.

During our conversations together, she often referred to it. That I was a good person, that everything about me is true, that this is how I live my life. At least my new life. Not that I am not still part of the person that I used to be before, but I was not always true to myself before, not always making the decision based on what my life was telling me, but perhaps what I thought was the easiest road or the easiest choice. Most of the time not for myself, but to please others, or to be present for others. Also, those choices were often dictated by my fears. My fears of leaving my parents when I was younger, my fears of being rejected by others or my fear of not being enough. 

When I think about it, I think a good person refers to someone that is living life by being true to yourself and by being honest about your feelings to people surrounding you. It is by being vulnerable and showing your emotions and being real and being yourself. I have often seen myself holding back on my feelings sometimes because I didn't want to hurt the other person or by fear of getting rejected. 
Life can be quite scary and a lot of time you have no idea of what is coming your way. We often try to avoid the hard conversations and the confrontations, because we will get hurt in the process. I've had my share of hurting over the past year, most of it due to not allowing myself to be true and honest with my own emotions and feelings for lots of years. For avoiding the signs that life was sending my way, which could have been not getting what I wanted from work, physical signs of my body or exhaustion. I have learned to listen to those signs and not try to numb all of them and ignore them. You have to listen to yourself and to your heart. Only you can decide what is the best decision for you or what is the best road or process to get to the end of the road. The end of the road can be a few days on some occasions, but the end of the road is often months or years to get through your process or journey. However, by hurting and listening to your heart, you are becoming a better person, and you are growing from it, and you become even more amazing. With each experience you are becoming more aware of yourself, of your surroundings, of what other people are looking for.

By being vulnerable, you are opening up your soul and your heart. You are allowing yourself to find true connections. Sometimes long time friendships, other days just someone to talk to at the bar for an hour or so. Whatever life sends your way, by being a good person, good things will come your way. 

My best friend, which I have only met a little while ago, gave me a small book when I was out to visit in Edmonton. Fits in the back of my purse and I have been reading it since I left there...on the cover it is  written, Believe. It is full of little sayings and quotes. Tonight, this is the one that is giving me strength, and helping me believe that this journey, will be ok. That I was to take it one step at a time, "ride the wave", like my therapist said, and take the time to make the right choices, being what is my heart is telling me, not just act on an impulse. So I do believe my therapist, I think I am a good person, working on becoming even better everyday. 

"You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing you think you cannot do." Eleanor Roosevelt 

Cheers,

Véronique 

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